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October 10, 2018: You Are and Just Breathe

Hi Brad and Brad,

I've navigated through 48 episodes to almost get completely caught up on your podcast.  I only have 4 more to go, since I began listening at Episode 53.  One track you guys talk very highly of is You Are throughout both seasons of SPT.  I really hadn't come to fully appreciate this song, until my wife bought me the Madison Square Garden DVD for Christmas about 10 years ago.  This was another example of my perspective on a track being changed after seeing it live.  Several times since then, I would just get the song playing over-and-over in my head, "Love is a tower and you're the key." After listening to the Riot Act episode, I read the lyric much more closely.  For me it represents a loved one being strong for you in a time of need. 

"You are a tower of strength to me.  The darkening hour sees light again."

"I am the shoreline, but you're the sea.  You are."

I find myself in another time of need.  Last Monday, I received a call from my sister telling me that my mom had fallen while back in her hometown of Sylvania, OH.  This prompted a visit to the ER and what was found was a tumor in her brain.  Unfortunately, they were not sure of the cause and did not operate at that time.  Over the next 9 days, my mom (who was with my dad) traveled back to Kansas City and waited to get an appointment with a neurosurgeon today.  It was like walking on egg shells.  Myself, my sister and my dad were trying really hard to hold it together while waiting to find out what the next step was.  Finally today, we learned that my mom will have surgery on Friday (Oct 12th) to have the tumor removed and biopsied.  The reason why I was so stressed out is because I was unsure if this would be operable or not, but after hearing the news today I am fully confident that my mom will persevere from this.  There's a long way to go in this journey, but knowing there is a journey ahead is something myself and my dad were unsure of.

Now back to You Are.  My rock through the past 9 days has been my wife.  Even after everything she has been through this year, she has been as steady as one would need in this time.  She traveled back with me to Kansas City (We were there from Saturday through Today) and was so important in helping me keep it together.  I am the shoreline, and Morgan is the sea. 


I apologize for how long this email has been, but I want to also touch upon Just Breathe.  I remember in one of the earlier episodes you guys were trying to think of tracks that would work for a Mother-Son dance.  My mom and I danced to Just Breathe at our reception.  It was funny, because while we were dancing she asked me "How much longer is this song?" The dance did seem like it went on for a long time, but looking back I'm glad that was a moment that didn't feel like it went by too quickly.  Every time I hear Just Breathe I think of our Mother-Son dance.  One of my favorite lyrics, not just by Pearl Jam, but of any song ever is.

"Oh I'm a lucky man, to count on both hands the ones I love."

My thoughts will be with her from Wisconsin as she starts her journey on Friday.




Forced to endure, what I could not forgive,

Chris


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